Clarity pt 2

"clear water" by Marcus Zorbis via Flickr  https://www.flickr.com/photos/zorbis/387275733

In this post I go over four new topics I learned about in  Rules For Writers and revise my QRG with the new things that I didn't really learn but more likely forgot about .

Balance Parallel Ideas : With this topic I already knew that the way certain sentences are written sometimes could be seen as awkward but I wasn't aware that ideas in a series or pair could be considered awkward as well if they didn't appear in the same grammatical format. It made me look over my lengthy sentences that  displayed a bunch ideas and wonder if they would be considered awkward. For example this sentence , " Regardless of America's’ disapproval more than 50 countries, even American  allies, Australia and South Korea, joined the founding of the AIIB  this past spring." It seemed fine when I read over it the first few times but then I just felt like it was series of awkward phrases my brain spit up .


Unnecessary Repetition of Words: Obviously I know what this is but I didn't realize it in my own writing . However when I scanned it for the umpteenth time I saw I kept repeating " This is why " and "That is the reason" at the beginning of my sentences. The topic suggested instead of keeping up a redundancy of words to give a more concise version of it , which helped in my revision.

Variety in Sentence Structures (Variety in General): I already knew I needed some variety in my paragraphs because of the last blog post when it was difficult to spot different sentence structures and purposes . The suggestion the book gave of varying my sentence openings connects with the previous topic of repetition. But , I also thought about varying the sentence purposes to make the article more interesting as well. for example I tried to add an interrogative purpose in one of my sentences. " As this would start to supply jobs money would flow easier , thus , helping some countries out of debt.  and why not? It would be beneficial to the greater good of the economy."

Add Words: Adding words wasn't something that I thought I needed to do ,but there was a comment from one of my peers who reviewed my writing that said they misunderstood that only America disapproved of the bank and from my previous sentences they assumed all the countries were against it as well. I think it was because of this sentence: "Although it seems to be a very positive economic move, not every country agreed with it’s creation." I thought maybe I should add that only one country disapproved of it .